“按照剧本，接下来你会被男主刺一剑，取出金丹送给他的白月光。”
“真的吗？我不信。只要我刺得更快，男主的剑就追不上我。”
“可你是虐文女主，你应该被男主虐……”
“我虐我以外的所有人，这也叫虐文。去，把男主给我在城墙上挂三天，看他啥时候哭着管我叫爸爸。”
……
《仙侠之弱水三千》，一部于20XX年横空出世的知名网络气人小说，集各种经典气人元素于一体，女主被误解、被陷害、被虐心虐身，被男主和108个女配轮流折磨三百章，终于修成HE。一时间，评论区刀光剑影，血雨腥风，“后妈大大骗我眼泪”派与“垃圾作者喂我翔”派battle三百回合，不分胜负。
舒凫，一位平平无奇的爽文爱好者，本着“不爽不看，憋屈滚蛋”、“再受不能受委屈，再苦不能苦女主”的基本原则，穿越到女主身上，被剧本安排得明明白白。
然后，她就把给女主气受的人都气死了。
***
骚到没朋友的刻薄仙人（♂）×人狠话还多的社会老哥（♀）
1、沙雕仙侠穿书文，强强1V1，男女主思路清奇，态度嚣张，一山更比一山骚
2、女主名字读作“舒服”，意思是本文引起极大舒适
3、男主非原书男主，美强不惨，蒂花之秀，说话好听得能出十本书，和女主组合可以达成全场AOE（原男主生前是个体面人，大家吐口痰再走吧）
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