101.朽木(1 / 1)
论萌宠是怎么练成的
2333的猫
1024 字
2022-04-27
我快刀斩乱麻的给钟意来了个简单明了到没谱的总结:“钟意,既然是想不明白你就别想了,你信我和小白不?信就行了,到时候你也不用想了,我和小白让你怎么就怎么,该装死装死,该装迷糊小新人——这个也不用装,你本色演出就好——就装小新人得了!也就演演戏的事儿,有多大事?” 钟意似懂非懂,不过也甚是老实的点点头:“嗯,我听你们的就是了。” 我长吁一口气,安心的拍拍钟意手背,安慰她道:“你别担心,这好些事情,我都能在你身边,也许就是有那么一两步要你自己独立走而已,到时候就算是我不好直接在你旁边指点,小白和乔飞星也会帮你的,你要相信,那俩都是一脉相承的奇葩,和我们认知中生于帝王家的天潢贵胃都不是一个路数的!当然,咱们俩本来也算是奇葩,奇葩和奇葩能凑一处玩耍也是很正常的,对不对?” 钟意继续点头道:“嗯,反正我也不想费脑筋想那么多,今天这意外情况就够我死一大堆脑细胞了,我只听你们的就是。你们商量好了就成,我别的不管,但是八卦我想听啊,要不宁容你想个法子带上我去旁观?” 这回轮到我有点儿迷糊:“你要旁观什么八卦?” 钟意伸长手从果盘里捞出来一个芒果颠着玩,换了兴致勃勃的口吻答道:“看选秀的八卦啊!想想看,能见证着一群早熟的小女孩儿玩儿宫心计什么的,现场版呢,多带劲啊!” 我哭笑不得,索性把剩下的芒果也一起塞钟意手里:“你少想那些个不实际的!真是以前宫斗剧看多了看傻了吧?都说了这些女孩儿就是来走个过场的,连晋封那一步都摸不着,肯定是原样送进来原样送出去的,还有什么宫心计好看?再说了,你是不是傻?你以后就是人家全体的共同敌人,共同的攻击目标啊,你还不赶紧的躲着她们跑?还自己送上门去立靶子?送人头也不是这么送的!” 钟意讪讪笑道:“我这不是没见过现场版的嘛?好奇行不行?难道你就不会好奇吗?” 我气得都要笑出声来了:“钟意,你搞搞清楚了,你是躲后头等看着戏等当皇后的,我呢?我是得站前头当恶人当容嬷嬷的!我得想尽法子给你排除这堆要争着当你情敌的小姑娘呢!还好奇?我没那个好奇的精力和时间哪!” 钟意苦恼的皱了眉头,嘟囔道:“那可怎么好?我不是没戏好看了?要不,要不,我不看直播了,宁容,你回来给我转播?” 这……这真是!真是朽木不可雕也!我是被折腾得都没脾气了,说了这半天,这朽木还是不忘看热闹!我可不管了,这雕刻大师且留着乔云靖自己做去,他自己选的朽木,他自己哭着也得接手了去! 我便把皮球踢小白身上去,哄钟意道:“你要看现场也成啊,让小白带着你去看嘛,装个小太监也好,小宫女也行,爱看多久看多久,可不是好?只别跟着我,让我这恶嬷嬷的形象装不下去就是。” 钟意拍掌笑道:“这个主意不错!我觉着这事能成!就是小白不肯,我也得磨得他肯了!” 我见这祸水东引成功了,便也不和钟意纠缠,这朽木留着给小白头痛就是,我且先忙活我的去是正经!我便起身道:“我去找人给小白通个话去,让太医院派个人来大张旗鼓的演一演——你怕是从这几日起就得开始装病了,虽然说这计划也不是什么严密的好计划,但好歹演戏演全套,以后小白和乔飞星联手睁眼说瞎话的时候也少被人抓点儿鸡脚啊!” 钟意顺势往炕上靠背的方向,懒洋洋的躺下去,侧脸对我吐舌道:“这样装得像不像?” 我笑道:“十分像!就躺那儿数你的果子玩去罢,我这就给你找配角来合戏!” 正说到这句,外头初夏便扬声通报道:“回淑太妃,皇上那边的戴公公同了太医院的姜案首来了,是来为淑太妃请平安脉稍微,请求见淑太妃。” 我顺手捞起来一个小被子给钟意盖上,又把屏风挪过来在炕前挡着,对钟意做口型道:“考验你演技的时候到了~~”随即也扬声往外头道:“且请进来!” 钟意忍笑忍得肩膀都一抖一抖的,我把她往墙那边推进去一点,自己站在了屏风前头,换上一本正经的面瘫脸且等着。 不多时,初夏就引着小白身边另一个心腹小戴子和姜案首进了来,两人立于屏风前请安问好了一番后,姜案首小心翼翼的问道:“淑太妃,皇上说您今儿似是有些儿身子不妥,特命了老臣前来为您请平安脉,您看,是不是这就……” 我见着这姜案首一脸的认真劲头,忙抬眼去看小戴子,小戴子也是个小机灵鬼,小白也是常常带着他在身边的,见我眼含疑问,顿时就懂我想问什么了,便仗着自己站的位置比姜案首退后半步,姜案首不回头看不见他的脸,对我挤眉弄眼的使眼色。 我便知道这姜案首不过是个入戏的老狐狸,便也懒得再拖钟意起来,大剌剌的直接转身走到屏风后,隔着那预备着诊脉的纱帘子,伸了一只右手出去——当然,这右手是我的,钟意两只手里都还抓着果子呢,那儿来的空当往外伸手? 姜案首怔了一怔,然后居然很镇定的当什么都没看见一般,装模做样的往我手腕上一搭,沉吟半响后,摇头晃脑道:“淑太妃这是伤心过甚,伤了些身子,不算大事,且让老臣开上几剂药,爱吃的时候吃些,不爱吃的时候也就罢了,静养些时日便无碍了。” 我一边收回自己手臂,一边暗自感叹,果然姜还是老的辣,瞧瞧人家,这睁眼说瞎话的技能,简直就是登峰造极加炉火纯青啊!我真是还得好好向这位“老姜”学习学习这技能呢!
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