第77章 掰手腕(1 / 2)

凶棺 零度 1192 字 2022-08-01

生活在北方的人都知道这是做什么,有的地方叫跳大神,有的地方叫出马仙。俗称,看香!

就听咚地一声,二神用鞭子敲了一下那扁骨,大神点了三炷香。紧接着二神就开始唱了起来,唱词不仅俏皮,还很押韵,二神唱完了大神唱,大神唱完了二神唱。各路大仙几乎被他们都请来了之后,这大神猛地浑身就是一哆嗦。

之后猛地睁开眼,直接就抱起那猪头啃了起来。妈的,那猪头虽然是煮熟了,但这么抱着啃一个猪头也不是很容易的事情,这得有多大的胃啊!

偏偏这戴着鲜花的老太太就把一个猪头很快就给啃个差不多了。

我喃喃道:“这到底什么情况啊!这神经病老太太不会变成大仙了吧!”

木容贞小声说:“哪里有那么多的废话?这不是江湖骗子,这是真的通仙师!”

我说:“你觉得一个大仙会抱着猪头啃吗?八成是个狐狸精吧!”

“你不知道,大仙都愿意吃人间的美味,凡是请下来的大仙,有的爱吃猪头,有的爱吃熏鸡,有的爱吃烤鸭,想请什么仙就要备什么吃的。”木容贞说,“安安静静看,不要说话了。”

这时候,大仙吃饱了,嘴上的油也不擦,问道:“你们叫我下来所为何事啊!”

说心里话,我总是觉得这件事有点扯。这老太太这是被大仙附体了?就因为她能吃一个猪头吗?看她大腹便便,这都是吃猪头撑得吧。怎么就那么觉得像是江湖骗子呢?

偏偏这时候,我看到了龙岛的秦总小跑着上了台,就像是演戏一样,到了台上先跪下磕了三个响头,然后说:“拜见上仙,这次请上仙下凡,是请上仙帮我等一个忙,近日有妖女重现天日,天下被搅得乌烟瘴气,又有尸煞为祸人间,可以说是人心惶惶,想请上仙出手将他们给抓起来,交给我等处置,我们日后一定会好好孝敬您来人家的。”

这扯不扯?这扯不扯呢?这个老太太在这里有什么本事就能将魏莱和尸煞给收拾了呢?我听到这里差点笑出来。

大仙这时候闷声闷气地说:“你们请我出马仙,来到这里风云关,倘若我要不出手,你们怎能把心安呐,把心安!”

这几句半说半唱的喷出来之后,我是真的憋不住了,直接扑哧就笑出声来了。

我这一笑,顿时大仙不干了,一抬头就看到了我,她一拍桌子用手一指说:“下面何人?为何这等不严肃,是不是看不起我出马仙!”

我举着双手站了起来,呵呵笑着说道:“对不起您,实在对不起大家,我真的憋不住了。大仙儿,您是个诗人啊,您淫得一手好湿啊!”

木容贞这时候已经吓得浑身发抖了,她跪在地上小声说:“老邢,你别当这个是儿戏,你要是这样,谁也救不了你!”

秦总慢慢站起来,转过身看着我说:“混账,你还不跪下给上仙赔罪!今天我不管你是怎么进来的,但是你要识大体,你要有大局观,不管怎么说,你是个人明白吗?”

我对这个秦总可是没有一点好印象,说心里话,我对这里的每个人都没有什么好印象。还有就是,我周围的这些有几个是人,分明这里住着的是一群不分阴阳的尸体。

最关键的是,我怎么都觉得这是个骗局。什么请大仙,先不说有没有大仙,一个真的大仙难道一个猪头几个桃子就能请下来的吗?我对这些事有疑惑的。别说是大仙,就算是我,也不是一个猪头和几个桃子就能把我请去为谁卖命。

不过我不打算拆穿这些,只是一笑说:“诸位,实在是不好意思,其实我来这里就是打酱油的,你们继续,我走,我走总行了吧!”

我转身要走,大仙却喊了句:“台下之人不要走,请你到我身前来,我要送你见阎王啊,我要送你去西天!”

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