第731章不要乱来(1 / 1)
当时明月照彩云
我向苍天借明月
514 字
2022-04-26
哎呦喂,我这个人吧,一向都是遇强则强,遇弱则弱,如果对方一直跟我针锋相对,我绝对会奉陪到底,现在他换了策略,直接服软认输,我居然不知道接下来该怎么办了!不知道怎么办的结果就是极其热切地盼望银杏的到来,银杏一来,我们两个人合力制服这个刺客应该还是有点儿把握的。可是该死的银杏,怎么过了这么长时间了还没有办完差事!她若是不来找我,皇宫里的其它奴才都在喝酒找乐子,我就是被刺客杀了人灭了口都没有个人知道啊!
刚刚我还一腔热血、信心百倍地打算与刺客大战三百回合,最终成功地阻止他行刺皇上呢,此刻他的频频点头反而令我心生了胆怯之意,真是应了那句老话,初生牛犊不怕虎,老油条反而更加畏惧江湖的险恶。
“那个,你,你,你别乱来啊!”
“乱来?你刚刚不都说了吗?‘哪个男人不开眼,贪图你这等‘姿色’?”
哎呦,我这不是自己给自己挖坑吗?不过这个人也实在是气死活人不偿命,居然什么话他都能记着,有这过耳不忘的本事,不如去好好读书,当什么刺客啊!
“你可真能胡搅蛮缠,我说的是你行刺皇上之事别乱来,不是说……”
“哈哈哈,那你倒是早点儿说清楚了吧,你这说话留一半的,这能不想错了嘛!”
我这天生没羞没臊没脸皮之人,居然被他这番话说得极为不好意思起来,为了赶快从尴尬境地之中解脱出来,只能是故伎重演,话题转移。
“先别说我了,还是先说你吧,俗话说得好,不听老人言,吃亏在眼前!你最好还是听我一句,赶快把行刺皇上的想法统统都收回去,放下屠刀、立地成佛,回头是岸。看你这年纪,应该是早已娶妻生子,老婆孩子热坑头的日子多美啊,比脑袋整天拴在裤腰带上的日子强得不是一星半点吧?宫里这几日虽然内防空虚一些,但是我敢打保票,你等不到皇上回宫的那一天就得暴露了行踪,毕竟大内侍卫也不全都是吃软饭的,噢不对不对,吃干饭,吃干饭的……”
本来我正在义正词严地劝说刺客赶快悬崖勒马,这就回去跟老婆孩子过小日子去呢,结果关键时候掉链子,嘴皮子居然打滑,把“吃干饭”说成“吃软饭”,以致中途笑场,什么话都说不出来了,只剩下咯咯咯地笑个不停,直不起腰来。
结果不成想,我的这个笑场居然令刺客也忍不住地哈哈笑出声来!哎呦喂,刺客不都是天生的冷面杀手模样吗?怎么动不动就喜欢笑呢?也太不敬业了吧。还好,刺客终究还是刺客,最终先收住了笑意的还是他。
“先不管吃什么饭,行刺皇上的事情,这……,是做定了!”
“什么?你怎么油盐不进呐!你这是吃了秤砣铁了心呐!你信不信?你若是再不收手,我定是能让你死无葬身之地!”
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