第十九章 难道你就是传说中的娘炮(2 / 2)

绿茵伪星 妖氘妖氘 0 字 2021-06-04

但是那种完全不着调的话从一个男人嘴里说出来,顿时苏纬觉得一阵阵恶寒,一开始他并没有察觉到,但是后来他发现对方几乎每句话都要加一个语气助词,比如说‘啊哦呗呢咯’,听一会儿鸡皮疙瘩都出来了。

要是一个女生这么说话,还能理解,一个大老爷们在梦里这么说还是风骚的用背影对着自己,苏纬觉得自己如果再不醒,这个梦真有朝着噩梦方向发展的趋势。

很快苏纬就发觉自己错了,自己有些念头根本就不应该有,比如说刚刚想的那些,很快就变成了现实。

背对着他的家伙又开口了:“苏纬,我跟你说哦……”

“OK,StopStopStop!不要再这样说话了OK?”苏纬干净利落的阻止了对方的话语。

“为啥呢?”

“你能不能不要再每句话后面加一个语气助词?”

“啊?”

见对方听不懂,苏纬再次强调了一遍:“就是说你不要在每句话后面加一个‘啊哦呗呢咯’这样的字。”

“可是‘啊哦呗呢咯’是五个字啊!”

“我是说这五个字分开来,你的每句话后面不要有这五个字中间任何一个字!”

“哦,好的吧!”

“又来了……”苏纬用手捂着额头,很是无奈。

显然对方也发现了这一点,终于明白了过来:“哦哦,我懂了……那我换个语气说……了,不是你们这个年纪的年轻人,都喜欢这么说话?”

“谁说的?”苏纬翻了个白眼。

“你!你自己好好想想?”

苏纬回忆了下,还真是这样。

“聊啥?”

“这么说是你帮我抓住小偷的咯?”咯来了。

“不对啊,你不是梦里的家伙吗?”啊,吗,是两个字。

“对哦!”哦,有来了。

……

苏纬发现对方说话,其实完全就是因为自己的误导,对方说话其实就是一种模仿,在学习他说话的方式,想到这个,这下子尴尬的就轮到苏纬他自己了,正想说几句话缓解下尴尬的气氛,就听对方又说道:“还有,我发现你们这个年纪的都喜欢一个风格的偶像,尤其是那种从面貌上来看很容易性别不分的偶像……”

“停停停!谁说的?”

“不是我说的,是根据大数据调查得来的结果,在你们这个国家青少年中间,某某BOYS组合受欢迎程度为89%,甚至很多中老年人都对这样的‘小鲜肉’感兴趣,某某兴,某某韬、某某凡、某某某巴受欢迎程度不低于80%,还有某某昊,某某丞,某某农……”

苏纬再次无奈的翻了个白眼:“你特么用的是某度搜索引擎吧?”

“是……的,怎么,有问题?”

“没问题,没问题!谋门忒啦!”苏纬急忙举手投降,又说了一句对方听不懂的话,眼下这话题不适合再深入了,他的搜索记录里面还有某些个老师的番号全集呢,必须掐住这个话题了,不然再聊下去这楼就要歪了。

“OK,我们换个话题,说说那个《我点我点我点点点》,有啥用处啊?我还没试过呢!”

“喏喏喏,又来了!这就是你们人类喜欢说的,只许州官放火不许百姓点灯?”

“哈?”苏纬愣住了。

“不是你说我在说话的时候,加了语气词‘啊哦呗呢咯’很娘炮吗?刚刚你一句话里面有三个这样的字!‘好吧,说说那个《我点我点我点点点》,有啥用处啊?我还没试过呢!’看看,三个字,吧,啊,呢!我都是跟你学的啊,有问题吗?难道你就是传说中的娘炮?”

苏纬再次用手捂住了额头泪流满面,心中抑制不住的咆哮:你才是娘炮,你全家都是娘炮。

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