第八百四十一章 一桌草料【求月票】(2 / 2)

房俊房玄龄 公子許 0 字 2021-10-25

他事先自然是派了人前来通知房俊的,为此昨日还在海虞城停留了一日,就为了给房俊留下时间好生斟酌,莫要意气用事不来迎接,房俊即坏了官场规矩,自己有被这了面子,沦为笑柄。

可谁知道这小子还真就这么干了!

至于自己派来通知的属下,不用问这时候指不定在那个牢房里关着呢,甚至房俊若是手黑一点,怕是早都一命呜呼了,死无对证啊……

张亮紧紧闭着嘴,不说话,他怕自己一张嘴,一口鲜血就能吐到房俊的脸上!

房俊似乎也觉得既然将张亮的面子狠狠的踩了,再说这些风凉话也是无趣,便一脸真诚的说道“这里喧闹吵杂,实在不是叙话之地。为表歉意,某在镇公署里备下了美酒佳肴,尽皆是江东风味,给国公赔罪。国公,请吧?”

张亮心里运着气,可也知道自己现在是先机尽失,若是不能顺杆爬下去,保不齐这个黑小子又出什么幺蛾子。可若是让他对房俊笑脸相迎,却委实做不到……

只是“哼”了一声,一甩袍袖,当先而行。

镇公署的大堂之内,张亮瞪着桌上的席面,只觉得自己心脏都快气得抽抽了,恨不得当场就将桌子给掀了!

凉拌竹笋、竹笋香菇汤、菘菜拌木耳……

菜倒是四凉八热摆了满满登登一桌,可瞅瞅这青的青绿的绿黑的黑白的白,房俊你特么是要喂兔子么?

房俊手持公筷,不停的往张亮面前夹菜,脸上热情洋溢的笑容“来来来,国公肯定没尝过这个菘菜吧?关中也有,但是绝对不是这个味儿,长江流域才是菘菜的原产地,味道最正宗,关中那边的不好吃……再尝尝这个凉拌竹笋,跟您说,这道菜可讲究了……”

张亮咬着牙“竹笋么,难道大总管以为某没吃过?”

去你的娘咧!

一个破竹笋,再讲究还能变成灵芝人参不成?

房俊啊房俊,你特么也算是损到家了,你就是不招待我这一顿,也比弄这么一桌子兔子食儿强的多吧?

房俊顿时哈哈大笑,得意洋洋道“诶,国公这可就错了,竹笋常见,可是某这个竹笋,却与一般的竹笋不同……”

张亮忍着怒气,很想说一句这特娘的不是一般的,难道还是二般的不成?

房俊似乎丝毫没有感受到张亮的怒气,自顾自的介绍着这道“二般”的竹笋“跟您说啊,这可是某的独家秘制之方,要在清晨的露水未散之前,由年方二八的处子手持金锄,将新生的竹笋挖出,剥去外层,将最最纤嫩的笋心儿放在怀中,紧贴着胸膛,用处子的体温和独特体香来滋养,因此,这竹笋既有天地之精华,又有处子之纯洁,实乃夺天地造化之灵物,食之可延年益寿、滋阴健脾……”

苏定方等人尽皆率军出海训练,刘仁愿和席君买陪客,听到房俊话语,忍不住差点笑场,赶紧低头扒饭。心里却快要笑抽,侯爷诶,就服您这一本正经胡说八道的本事……

张亮本以为房俊就是胡诌八扯来羞辱自己,满桌子连一片肉一条鱼都没有,还能不能再过分一点?

可是听着房俊口若悬河的解说,看着他一本正经的面容,张亮疑惑了……

难不成这竹笋还真的有如此奇效?

若是换了旁人,听到房俊这么一本正经的胡说八道,老早就掀桌子翻脸!你特么就算拿金子将这竹笋镶个金边,它就不是竹笋,变成金笋了?

可张亮还偏偏就信了……

他这人最是喜好巫蛊左道,交结巫师方士,相信谶言之术。

张亮私下对宠信的术士程公颖道“您从前说陛下是真正的天下之主,怎么说得这么神?”程公颖知道张亮的意思,便称其卧如龙形,必能大贵。张亮又对公孙节的哥哥公孙常道“我有一个小妾,算命的说她一定能成为王姬。”公孙常则说道“有神告公名在谶书。”张亮大喜……

由此可见,张亮是何等迷信。

所谓的巫师方士,便极其擅长元阴之术,讲究一个采阴补阳。

如此说来,这道竹笋当真有奇效不成?

张亮正自心中疑惑,倏地发现刘仁愿和席君买只顾着低头扒饭,可肩膀却耸动不停,哪里还反应不过来自己被房俊给耍了?

顿时必然大怒,拍案而起,须发戟张道“房俊,安敢辱我至此?”

房俊心中暗骂刘仁愿与席君买两个窝囊废,活该拼下了无数功勋,最后却落得个凄惨下场!

人生如戏、全凭演技,你俩一点演技都没有,混个屁呀?

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