第1章 我奶奶(2 / 2)

奶奶指指碗里的瓜子皮,说:“你回去把这个用清晨的第一桶井水煮了喝汤。”

男秘书一脸嗤之以鼻,“耍我们玩儿呢,老太婆?这玩艺儿能治病?”

“你闭嘴!”老板制止了秘书,他犹豫了一下——自打得了这怪病,奇奇怪怪的中药没少吃,许是真有效果呢?

他说:“试试看吧。老人家,诊金怎么付?”

奶奶又点上烟,叭叭地抽上一口,道:“喝好了再来找我,喝不好,随你们砸我招牌。”

老板让秘书收下,秘书走的时候还在唧唧歪歪:“老板,这老太婆忽悠你呢,这玩艺能治病我把脑袋拧下来当球踢。”

奶奶冷笑一声,有点干瘪的双颊抽动了下,她不是没脾气的人,只是喜怒很少显露在脸上。

要用清晨第一桶井水煎药,二人自然要留在村里借住。隔日一早,他们又来了,这次老板也不要人抬了,自己健步如飞地走了进来,肚子依然是鼓鼓的,可气色已经好了不少。

一进屋,老板恭敬地深作一揖,“老人家,啊不,老神仙……您这药真是太灵了,早上煎了一碗喝,胎动停下来了,我这心也不闹腾了!昨天我们是有眼无珠,罪过罪过,这是我的一点心意!”

秘书打开一个手提箱,里面是成沓的钞票。

老板又央求道:“老神仙,请您再给开一服药,把我这病根绝了吧!”

奶奶不紧不慢地说:“你这病呀,是有来历的,你是不是平时不检点,有什么癖好啊?”

“嘶……”老板一寻思,搔着脸颊讪笑着说:“您是指,生活作风?”

奶奶却摇头,“病从口入、祸出口出,我是问你吃过什么不该吃的东西。”

老板想了想,说:“也没有呀,平时各种应酬,胡吃海塞的。我一般不挑食,就算没有满桌子山珍海味,单给我鱼翅泡饭、海参炒饭也能凑和凑和。”

奶奶一语道破:“如果我没猜错的话,你吃过紫河车。”

老板面色一寒,秘书小声在他耳边提醒,“老板,这老太婆有两下呀!你平时为了滋补壮阳,不是经常吃胎盘吗?”

老板狠狠瞪他一眼,“什么‘老太婆’,你嘴里给我放干净点儿!”然后佩服之至地对奶奶说,“老神仙神鉴呀,我肾虚,气血不足,找个老中医给我开了这服药,每月吃一回吧!”

奶奶接着说:“吃紫河车其实也不要紧,问题是你吃了不该吃的。现在你肚子里的这个胎儿本来就要降生,却被母亲抛弃,生生夹碎了流出来,后来被庸医卖给了你,你当作胎盘吃了。它已有三魂,但七魄不全,到了你肚里之后,恰逢你阴阳相交……”

老板脸上一红,“您真是活神仙,实不相瞒,我每次吃了这东西,就会找我的情人过夜。”

奶奶正色道:“阴阳互补,本是孕育新生的仪式,这个七魄不全的胎儿误把你的肚子当成娘胎,吸收你的精血生长起来,但它毕竟是个虚胎,也可以叫作鬼胎,越长越大,却无法真正形成肉身,最后只会把你吸干!”

老板面如霜打,扑通一下跪在地上,“请老神仙救我一命,哪怕舍掉万贯家财,我也愿意!只要你救我一命,从今往后,我愿认您当干娘!干娘,救儿子一命吧!”

奶奶抬手,“男儿膝下有黄金,你先起来。你这病光吃药已经不灵了,其实这胎儿也是无辜的,我需要做一场法事超度了它……”奶奶掐指一算,“再过三天便是初一,初一的子夜之时,我们在村里的打谷场进行法事,这三天你继续服我给你开的安胎药。”

“安……安胎药?”老板大惊。

奶奶笑笑,“不先安住它,要怎么哄它走呢!”

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